Every once in a while I notice that I’ve built up emotional gunk from just everyday life. I try my best not to, by being true to myself and expressing my feelings as they are; by trying not to shove things under a carpet, only for them to be discovered later.
I’ll be honest, that doesn’t work in all situations and there are times when I have no clue about what I’m doing. So my formula is not really foolproof…neither is life!
When I find myself being impatient, angry or ready to cry at the drop of a hat, I know it’s time for a fix. More often than not I know what exactly has caused a pile up and I need to release it – either by having a long pending conversation with the person involved or by sorting out my thoughts and feelings. It’s a process…but it works for me.
I find the conversations part simple. I just come clean and make it a point to be open to what the other person has to say. Sometimes we can get on the same page, sometimes we agree to disagree, and that’s okay with me. All that matters is that at the end of the conversation we both know what to expect from each other should the situation arise again.
The part where I need to sort out my thoughts or feelings is a little more difficult, because if it cannot be resolved through a conversation it usually is a situation that’s out of my control. By this point, I’ve exhausted my mind worrying about it… I desperately need a release or my head will explode from all the worries and fears that I’ve caged in it!
Here’s what I do, and it works like a charm… I blow up some balloons and write on them every little worry, every little fear I have regarding the situation. I don’t care about how silly I sound or what words I use. I just need to get it out of my system. I write on as many balloons as I need to, and when I have flushed everything out of my mind I let the balloons go. It’s fun, makes me feel lighter and gives me a clean emotional slate.
It also reminds me that I cannot control certain things or allow my fears and worries to weigh me down.
We all have unique ways of dealing with emotions or releasing them. What are yours?
When I’m totally relaxed and listening to a song I like, I close my eyes and see myself dancing to it. I usually don’t see my face or any distinguishing features, just a form, a dancer…dancing away like nothing else matters. She’s one with the music and doesn’t have to think about how her body is moving, it just is. Sometimes there are flowing props like sheer cloth, sometimes she’s wearing a skirt that makes it look like she’s floating. She’s always in the moment, enjoying herself. It’s not something I make an effort to visualize, it just happens and I feel liberated whenever it does. It makes me think I have the soul of a dancer.
It also makes me profusely wish for that part of my soul to be friends with my body! You see, I have two left feet. At Zumba I’m usually the one turning left when everybody else is turning right. When I’ve mastered the footwork for a dance step, you can look up to see that I have frozen arms, or vice versa. It baffles me how I can just close my eyes and become this form that can waltz, ballet, salsa and do just about anything with the grace of a swan.
For years I’ve thought about taking dance lessons to see if I can actually breathe life into that part of my soul. I’ve been putting it off because I’m shy, mostly afraid of embarrassing myself given my general lack of coordination.
But now, I’d like to change that; mainly because I’m consciously busting any limiting thoughts I have about myself or the things that I can do. I want to explore other ways that I can share myself with the world.
I want to break free of my mental barriers and create an imprint of the unique signature that is my soul. Project Pirouette, here I come!
What about you? When do you feel most connected with your soul, or that form in your head that eludes explanation? Do leave a comment below, I’d love to hear about it!
There’s nothing or nobody more powerful than you standing up in all your glory for what you believe in.
There will be times when you’ll be overwhelmed by the world,
by people who let themselves run cold.
That will never get old…
But, oh dear soul, don’t lose hold…
Don’t lose hold of your pureness or your innocence,
even if it feels like you are defying common sense.
For you are the light that keeps this world going,
even if you don’t see it, it is showing…
your tribe is growing…
If you ever find yourself in doubt, if it seems like you cannot make a choice, go with what feels right to your heart…with what feeds your soul. Sometimes it might not be the easiest thing to do, it might seem like you’re being selfish or not paying heed to your responsibilities. But, after a few times of trying it, you’ll see that everything else always falls into place when you’re making decisions based on what feels right for you.